Ok jus one more time I lets you look at mah nose. Jus this one time.
Dear Diary, today, my Mommy say, “Lucy, Grandpa buy you a speshul present!” And I so excited.
So as it turn out, even though there were a baff, today are pretty much best day of ever. Got mah new tire toy, sneaked a bunch of things out of a bag of trash, and had a small nap! Everything so best right now! Thank you Grandpa, I knows you love me so much!!
Dear Diary, today I gotta sad. Today mah tire toy go to Heaven.
Mah tire toy were mah fav-o-rite of all the toys in the world. My aunties get it for me las Chris-mas. Mah aunties are Auntie Katherine and Auntie Jill, and they gets me this toy, and Uncle Bryon deliver it to mah house, and all them do it acause they knows I will love it the most.
But then I tugs too hard, and it fall apart. And Mommy tell me that it go to Heaven. And this make me so sad that I gotta put mah tee-shirt on acause I ank-shus, and then I hides in mah bed with mah Pillo-Pet.
But today, Mommy say I gotta stop the pouts and I gotta take off mah tee-shirt acasue it smelly and givin me the itches. And I are sad bout this, but then, she say we can play the rope toy! Rope toy not as good as tire toy, but I gonna be ok. Look mah tiny teefs!
Mommy promise me I can make a speshul story blog this week bout mah tire toy and bout all our ad-ven-shures together. And she say maybe we can call mah aunties and they can tells me where to get a new one. So it gonna be okay, even though I gonna miss mah tire toy so much.
Hi friends! Guess what today are? It are the birthday of Dave Matthews! That Mommy’s favorite. But guess what else it are?
Acause it were mah speshul day, Mommy make a nice big dinner, and part of it are jus for me. But the part that are not for me, are the raw potato part. I still gets one of those and I sneaks it onto the couch!
Mommy think this verruh funny. It turn out, joke on Lucy, raw potato hard to eat when it so verruh large like the one I sneaked. I has to chew verruh much with mah teefs and Mommy jus laff and laff at me.
Then I has to do a ‘leave it’ afore I can eats. Even though Mommy put me through so many tasks afore I allowed to have mah treats, I know she a good Mommy, and I know she always do the right things for me, like tucks me in a blankey when it cold, and wipes mah poopoo toe, and makes me mah own fish. I glad that three years ago, Mommy find me.
And I glad that even though I sneaked a potato, Mommy still gives me mah fish. This how I know that I got the right Mommy and Daddy. So even though today my gotcha day, I know I glad that I gotcha-d them!
Mah friends. Tonight not mah finest nite. Here are what I do. It are verruh bad. I goes in the yard to do mah after-dinner poo. And after mah poo, I are verruh excited, and so, though I does not know why I does it, I does a small dance into mah poo.
I knows. I knows you not aposed to do a small dance into your poo, but it jus happen. It happen jus like that. One moment, I make a poo. Next moment, I so excited to have made mah poo, and then I jus does the small dance right there. Right in the poo. It get all in mah toe.
Daddy run me all through the snows. He hope the poo jus come off by itself. But no. No it does not. It are all over mah toe. We has to rush in the door and stand on the lin-o-leem and shout verruh loud for Mommy. And Mommy has to scrub mah poopoo paw a million times with hot water and a smelly medicine. And it are so awful. But finally, after a million minutes, mah poopoo toe all clean.
Mah friends. This so a-shame-ful. I cannots even believe I would do this. Never can I ever again do a small dance after mah poo. It are too risky. Never can I ever again have the poopoo paw. It were worst thing ever. I gonna go be shamed all night now.